Posts Tagged ‘rant’

I have spent two weeks after the departure of Commando and Catholic Girl went on Call Break doing 2 persons’ work.

Then I spent one week thereafter doing 3 persons’ work because Champagne Truffle went on holiday, a holiday he had booked because he thought that Commando would cover his work but then Commando left so tough luck.

So I haven’t done any of my own work for 3 weeks now. It is making my scalp itch and setting my teeth on edge. I am in perpetual high alert to duck in case anything explodes. I have spent many days laughing too much (because laughing is my coping mechanism) and many nights at home playing sad Chopin Nocturnes till midnight to wind down. It is not pretty.

Then on Monday, all the people on leave came back, much to my relief.

But The Buddha decided to have a protracted thermonuclear meltdown for an entire week, culminating in me spending two hours this morning just counselling people.

I thought that I could come into work today and look at my own files and answer my mail and feel better about life in general. But the morning is over, all I have done is to draft one overdue application and I have to scoot off to Court in the afternoon. This is just not happening for me.

I think I need a holiday from these people except that I have a new paralegal coming in on Monday and I have to reorganise the work to fit her into the team. So I am just going to down a shot of vodka (!!) and head out to Court to get on with the program.

Have I ever mentioned how much I hate being middle management?

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Just so you know I weren’t kidding about the downs of my job:

Right after I had that feel good moment at work on Tuesday evening, I proceeded to spend Wednesday afternoon in Court queuing up for so damn long for some chain collision matter which didn’t belong to me but I was doing someone a favour by attending that every second person who walked past me said to me, “Eh? You haven’t gone in yet?”

While I was queuing up looking more and more pissed off by the minute, some dude said to me, “Don’t stress. Your skin is breaking out.”

Then when I was finally done, I couldn’t get a taxi and it started raining.

When I finally crawled back to the office looking like something the cat dragged in, downed a shot of something alcoholic and started to clear my paperwork, The Buddha walked past me standing at the fax machine waiting for a fax transmission receipt and nonchalantly remarked, “Your hair is in a mess.”

When I was finally ready to go home long after the sun had set, I couldn’t get a cab again.

And all of this while I was under flu meds.

I don’t even.

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Just so we are clear:

I periodically delete people off my Facebook friends list. I do so because I no longer want these people to participate in my life.

I also delete people off my phone book, usually the same people I delete from my Facebook friends list and some other people I no longer have any desire to waste any memory on. So when you text me and my reply is “Who are you?” You know you have been deleted.

So it is personal. I am not denying that. Remember that I am just as entitled as the next person to be petty and small minded on occasion.

If you are one of the deleted, you have a few options:

1. You can ask me in person why I deleted you. But before you do that, please ask yourself whether you really want to know and whether you really can handle me telling you in your face what a shitty person I think you have been to me.

2. You could try to add me back. Sometimes I add people back. That is when I become indifferent to whether or not they participate in my life. That can only happen through passage of time. Or I’ll ignore your friend request. Then you have confirmation that I really don’t want to be friends.

3. You can ignore me in real life, which is probably what I hope you’d do anyway so no skin off anyone’s nose and we all get to escape that awkward silence in the middle of small talk.

4. You can bitch to the next 20 people you meet about what a piece of shit I am. That’s okay by me too because the feeling is mutual. But seriously? You want to tell 20 people how you are upset because I un-friended you on Facebook? That’s kinda sad, right?

5. You can pretend that you don’t know and continue to be nice to me. In which case, you will have to deal with the awkward silence in the middle of small talk and also the occasions where I turn all shifty and weird towards you because I sometimes do when put under stressful social situations.

I have just found out over the course of the last 2 weeks or so that there are apparently dire consequences in the workplace flowing from un-friending people you know at work on Facebook.

I am appalled. Everyone should just take a chill pill and knit a frog hat as follows:


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Me: I have just logged into the website 5 times over the last hour or so and I cannot redeem my credit card points. This is not a new problem. I have had this same problem over the last 2 years or so and I was told that there might be a problem with my card. But you issued a new card to me just two months ago and I still can’t redeem points online. What is the problem?!

She: Oh, how did you log in?

Me: By my online PIN with the OTP sent to my phone.

She: By the card number and expiry date?

Me: I have tried it that way too. It is just not working out for me.

She: Can I ask you some verification questions?

Me: Sure.

She: [asks for my name, ID number, birthdate…] What was the last transaction on your card?

Me: Huh? Erm…I think it was lunch on Monday.

She: How much?

Me: ?!?! Erm…$21.00?

She: Any other transactions?

Me: There could be but I can’t remember!!

She: Any other transactions you can remember?

Me: WTF?!

She: Okay. Let me change the question. What is your mother’s name?

Me: ?!?! [proceeds to spell mother’s name]

She: Let me check…It seems like someone has blocked your phone PIN function. No worries. I will unblock the function and send you a PIN number.

Me: What has my phone PIN got to do with logging in ONLINE to redeem rewards? Not like I need my phone PIN to log in online right?

She: Yes. But you cannot redeem points online if your phone PIN is blocked.

Me: But why? And I have never had a phone PIN in the history of me banking with you! And why hasn’t anyone told me this over the last two years?!

She: I’m sorry. But I have unblocked your phone PIN. You can try to log in now.

[After a long while of logging in and trying to redeem points…]

Me: It still has an error message!!! I still can’t redeem my points!

She: Okay…maybe you should wait for your phone PIN to arrive in the post before you try to log in and redeem points again. Can I redeem your points for you over the phone now?

*head explodes*


In other news, The Other Half has just booked a holiday to Legoland etc in two weeks! The kiddies can now stop harassing us about wanting to sit on “the dragon choo-choo train”!

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There’s a rather virulent strain of stomach flu going on. I’ve been either nursing it myself or wiping down some kid’s arse / mouth or stuffing medicine down little throats and cuddling fussy whiny children whom even monsters won’t come close to.

This morning, my sister said to me, “This is really terrible! My whole family was down over the week! You know the next time when your kids are ill, can you just keep them at home and not bring them over to the parents’ so that my kids can catch it from them?”


Apparently it is okay for my whole family to shut down but not hers. Apparently it is also my fault that your immune system is not rocks enough.

And then she told me that her family was so sick of staying at home that they went out, stomach flu and all, to the park on Sunday.

Wait a minute. Doesn’t that mean that she is infecting other people who come into contact with them at the park? And that’s okay while it is not okay for my kiddies to come into contact with her kiddies while they are ill because I have to do a couple of trials that no one can do for me and the Court is not about to reschedule on account of my kiddies being ill?

How about not bringing her kiddies to my parents’ place when my kiddies are ill? Since it is so easy to get leave off work in her universe right? And you think I want all the kiddies to be ill? I don’t. But it happens. You catch it from cousins or you catch it from school. It just happens. It is inevitable.

Or maybe I am such a convenient scapegoat for everything that she has forgotten Logic.

I just really don’t.

So here’s a picture of Star Scream strangling Bumblebee as a reflection of my frustrations:


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Why is it that sometimes when you catch someone pulling a fast one over you, they get all indignant about it? Like discovering that they were pulling a fast one over you is some kind of a personal failing on your part? Like it is my fault that can’t get past the gate? Like it’s my job to leave the gate ajar and even to guide you through with a smile?

Seriously, it is bad enough that you were trying to steal from me. But to try to make me feel bad about you stealing from me? That is just plain wrong.

Now I am all confused because on some level, I would like to salvage the professional relationship: it is just not healthy for us to be avoiding each other this way.

Sometimes, it’s just so not worth it, you know? Since this year started, I have been yelled at by no less than two spouses of opponents who feel slighted on behalf of their other halves. And I am not even sleeping with these people, for crying out loud!

I would like to say that I am deeply misunderstood except that all of the “misunderstood” people I know also tend to be so freaking weird that even I don’t want to talk to them, which is really saying a lot, and it is a little too complicated and existential to try to differentiate the levels of “misunderstood” on a Wednesday morning, as in what is the minimum number of levels you need to by misunderstood on to be qualified to call yourself “misunderstood”. Real life is too complicated for my puny brain this morning.

I’m just all out of sorts today. Maybe that’s because I’m feeling a bit under-appreciated this morning, or maybe it is due to the fact that this is the second day in the row I missed my alarm and woke up late, which probably means that I should sit out lunch in case I buy something expensive.

Oh look. I have a new pen from last week.

Oh look. I have a new pen from last week.

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lazy hazy crazy

When the outside of your office looks like this:


And you have just returned from a holiday not too long ago from a place that looks like this:


It well and truly sucks. Like my Dyson vacuum cleaner.



ETA at 5:20pm

After I wrote the above entry, I ordered 150 kiddie face masks online for my kids because they don’t sell kiddie face masks at pharmacies and the hospitals are out.

Right after that, the PSI fell from 400 to 148.

The world hates me. I feel disowned by the Cosmos.

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