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Archive for July, 2013

Here is the self-explanatory picture of how our Monday’s been:

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This is a new first. I have never had to resort to drinking at my desk until today.

It’s really good though. Chocolate + Grappa really hits the spot. Champagne Truffle and I stood around my desk with one shot each. We sipped. We collectively sighed. We downed it, then we carried on. Our souls fortified, as the Russians would say.

I’m surprised I haven’t thought of this earlier.

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The Other Half and I don’t read the same things at all. He reads Sci-fi, Fantasy and Philosophy while I read a lot of literature, both old and new, some fantasy, a lot of Russians and I have a current fascination with detective noir.

In fact, we don’t even read on the same medium these days. I buy truckloads of books every year while he downloads them onto his Note 2.

So sometimes, when I read something that I think he will like, I will text him and let him know. Most times he doesn’t get around to read them but I text him anyway, for that off day when he runs out of things to read.

*

Text conversation between The Other Half and I in reference to this book [which doesn’t really fall in any of my reading preferences but was written by Terry Pratchett and about cats so I bought it]:

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She: The cat book is hilarious. You should have a go at it.

He: Wilco

She: Who’s wilco?

He: Cousin of Roger Dat

She: My toes are laughing.

He: You have easily amused toes

*

Isn’t it amazing that after 7 years and two kids we still have these stupid conversations together? 😀

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the last few days

Peanut: Mummy, why you come home so late?

Mummy: Because Mummy’s colleague left the firm and Mummy needs to finish up all his uncompleted work.

Peanut: Why, Mummy?

Mummy: It’s a bit like how sometimes 弟弟 and you are supposed to put away the toys together but 弟弟 goes off and you have to pack the toys all by yourself.

Peanut: Oh dear!

*

I will never get an apology. Can we settle for a rather stiff drink instead?

😦

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toffee apples

1. Procure and wash some organic unwaxed apples and leave them out to dry on the sink.

2. Place 1.5 cups of brown sugar with 1/4 cup of water and 1/4 cup of corn syrup in a saucepan over low heat. Then decide that this should be an adult version and add in another 1/4 cup of dark rum. Stir till sugar crystals dissolve and leave it to heat, occasionally shifting and rocking the pot to get rid of heat spots.

3. Go and lie down on your kick ass sofa and wait. Check the temperature of the liquid about once every 15 to 30 minutes.

4. Take a picture of the inconsiderate cat who sits on your chest and pushes her butt into your bored and disgruntled face with the front facing camera of your mobile phone as follows:

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5. When the temperature of the liquid passes 135degC, stand over the pot with the thermometer and watch it like a hawk till it hits 148degC to 150degC. Turn off the heat and move the pan off the stove to cool.

6. Cut disposable chopsticks into half and drive them through the top of 6 apples. Lay non-stick paper onto a tray and place it next to the pot of molten sugar.

7. Stare at the molten sugar, wondering why the bubbles have not disappeared on their own. Then add 1 teaspoon of cochineal red colouring and stir the caramel till all the bubbles have disappeared.

8. Coat the apples and let it set on your dining table under the ceiling fan.

Toffee Apples complete!

Toffee Apples complete!

9. Serve them, gift wrapped, to your best friend in Court the next day for his 50th birthday!

The End 🙂

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My trusty rusty Borsch combination mixer expired a couple of weeks back so this evening after parking one child with my mother-in-law, The Other Half and I took the other child to an electronics place in a suburban mall to look for a replacement.

After deciding on another Borsch combination mixer (a more kick ass one), I asked the nearest sales assistant to bring us a set.

He hesitated for a second, then asked, “Actually, what do you want it for?”

I looked back blankly, thrown off by the question. “Erm…I like the functions?”

So off he goes. I exchanged looks with The Other Half.

So a moment later, the dude returns looking almost triumphant. “It’s out of stock!” he announces.

“What?!” said I.

“It’s out of stock,” he repeats.

The Other Half and I exchanged looks again. Then he took down the model number and we left feeling completely mindfucked.

Seriously,  what was that about?!?

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borrowed coat

This is something that happened a while ago which I was reminded of today while reading someone’s status update on Facebook:

My opponent and I were sitting along the corridors outside the courtrooms discussing an ongoing case while waiting.

Another lawyer came and stood by us, adjusting his coat and tie while joining in the conversation.

“I had a last minute mention. I wasn’t even dressed for court today. Luckily I had a spare white shirt in the office.”

Story of our lives. Both my opponent and I made sympathetic comments.

“I had to go to the bar room to borrow this jacket from the closet!!”

We stared.

“You borrowed someone else’s jacket from the closet?! Who?!?” my opponent asked.

“I don’t know. I just took one at random. It fits okay.”

“Ewwww!!” said I. “What if it hasn’t been washed in ages! I hope it doesn’t give you rashes!!”

“It smells okay,” he said. “Maybe I should steal it. I wonder what brand it is.”

He flipped out the coat lapel to look at the label. The brand, embroidered on in gold thread, read BUSO*.

It was a quite a while before any of us could stop laughing.

* which sounds like busok (being malay for smelly)

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carry on

Mummy: If you’re lost and alone or you’re sinking like a stone…

Peanut: Carry on on on on on!!

Lion: Mummy, why we don’t have this song in the car?

*

Paranoid mummy thinks – Am I playing this album too much? Should the kids be learning fun. lyrics? [mentally runs through the lyrics of the song to check for age appropriateness]

Groupie mummy thinks – Cool!!!

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